HURRY, HURRY, HURRY!
‘Tis May bank holiday and an amazing full colour advert has just dropped through the letter box.
It’s most impressive I can tell you – exactly what I needed on bank holiday!!
DON’T DELAY! Everyone is to HURRY to the SPECIAL EVENT – ONE DAY ONLY – at the Parish Hall in some piddling little village I have never heard of.
Oddly enough, I couldn’t help thinking that the seriously impressive, full colour multi-page brochure didn’t somehow fit with the location of the event, but hey, what do I know?
Whatever, EVERYONE must hurry along there – ONE DAY ONLY! – and take all our unwanted gold, jewels and antiques for a FREE VALUATION!
And (this will astound you!) they will make you an ON THE SPOT CASH OFFER
For ALL your unwanted items WITH NO OBLIGATION!
Mrs P. Brown of ‘Northern England’
says “I never thought that my late husband's gold pocket watch and my Diamond engagement ring and wedding ring would be worth so much – I was so pleased when I got £100 for them!”
But remember people, this SPECIAL EVENT is for just ONE DAY ONLY (‘cos we have to move to another area real fast!)
To assist the hard of thinking, lots of full colour photos were presented to show you just the sort of things that could be worth REAL MONEY!
(did anyone think they were offering fake money?)
You wouldn’t have guessed, GOLD, DIAMONDS, VICTORIAN GERMAN DOLLS, EXQUISITE HAND CARVED FURNITURE, OLD PAINTINGS, RARE CHINESE POTTERY – all these and LOTS MORE could be worth HARD CASH!
Don’t risk sending your valuables through the post for cash – hurry to our special event and let us rob you blind face to face. It’s really easy!
Sorry, this advert just screamed ‘RIP OFF’ at me.
(Note from Mike - I remember getting a leaflet through the door at my old house from someone wanting to buy virtually anything you might have. We were getting ready to move house and had a load of furniture that we felt was worth selling rather than having to pay someone to move, and so rang the number on the leaflet. When he arrived it became immediately clear that the only thing that he was interested in was jewellery, despite having a long list of things, including furniture, on his leaflet.)
Feel free to check out my parents mail order business selling all kinds of weird and wonderful magical goodies at www.facebook.com/RavenMagical