Wednesday, 27 April 2016

Facebook's news feed is trying to get me killed

Facebook is supposed to have these awesome algorithms that show you things of interest to you, right?

Today I got a link encouraging me to "Leave The City And Go Raise Huskies In Lapland", a link which talks about living in a cabin with no water or electricity in Lapland. To be fair it's quite an interesting read, but the title really isn't for me.

These aren't huskies, but I don't have any pictures of huskies.

I'd be rubbish at raising huskies in a specialist dog raising school in a nice warm climate, never mind sending me to Lapland.  My thumbs and heels would crack in the cold weather, I'd have no phone without electricity (and even if I got it charged would I have superfast broadband?  Seems unlikely) and meanwhile the huskies would lose all respect for me and spending their days chasing me round and round until I fell over and they could run me over with the sled.

Apparently on a good day you can get some water boiled in twenty minutes.  I expect over twenty minutes to have made a drink, drunk it, and then be trying to get someone to make me another one.

No, as interesting as a life in Lapland sounds, I think I'll stick with mine for now. If only there was a post advertising "Stay In Your House And Earn Money By Writing Not Very Funny Tweets"...

(I did this post as a vlog also, if you want to watch it...)


Sunday, 24 April 2016

Weekend end

When I got up this morning I managed to pull a hair out that had somehow got under the skin of my little toe, and I suspected that it would be the greatest thing that I did all day.

I was right.

Although I did note the below while shopping:


Which just goes to underline the importance of marketing - because a "scratchy bath glove" just wouldn't be the same at all.

Do you think that you can use it in the shower though?

Tuesday, 19 April 2016

Viruses are exposing themselves

Saw this in the shop the other day...


I'm particularly interested in the statement at the bottom of the box - "Use before exposure to viruses or the 1st signs of cold".  How do you know that you're about to be exposed to viruses?

Viruses, or virii (to use the proper term), typically measure somewhere between 104 and 109 nanometres in size.  You can't see them, just like you can't see bacteria (even though they're 500 times bigger).

My wife is currently studying a science course, so I asked her how you could detect if a virus was heading for you, and she obligingly came up with a solution.  Apparently if you have a scanning electron microscope, you could take a sample of something and indeed then scan it to see if there was a virus there waiting to expose itself to you.  Of course you'd need several thousand pounds to buy one, but no solution is perfect.

In other news, I've done an entry for the BBC Radio New Comedy Awards 2016, and it'd be kinda cool if people had a listen and perhaps even "like" it on Soundcloud (assuming that you do like it)

Saturday, 16 April 2016

A Rubbish Timetable #FixThePlus


I've noticed a pattern...

Monday morning - time for work!
Monday evening - phew, what a day!  Time to relax.
Tuesday morning - hmm, that kitchen bin is starting to look a little full.. hey, it's time for work!
Tuesday evening - I definitely need to empty that bin in the morning, but it gets too full.
Wednesday morning - boy that bin needs emptying... hey, time for work!
Wednesday evening - man that bin really needs emptying... First thing tomorrow, I'll empty the bin.
Thursday morning - running late!
Thursday evening - oh man, I meant to empty that bin. (Gives all the rubbish a big push down to try to make more room)  First thing tomorrow.
Friday morning - hey, it's Friday! Nearly the weekend!  Right, time for work!
Friday evening - that bin is far too full. But it's Friday night, time to kick back with a beer.
Saturday morning - why is it that every time I empty the bin is it overflowing?!? Next week, I'm going to empty it ahead of time.

If you liked this (or even if you didn't) go check out another blog I did recently mentioning rubbish.

Wednesday, 13 April 2016

Saturday, 9 April 2016

Working On A Card Game #FixThePlus

So, I spent the other evening printing and cutting out pieces of paper to trial my new card game.

Which, I can advise you, takes ages.

But the worst thing was when I realised that I really needed to be able to identify the cards (pieces of paper) when face down.

Bring on the ballpoint pen.

All done!

Still, I did get there in the end, and this morning I and my wife gave the game its very first playtest.  The game is called "Exos", and my game intro text is as follows:


You’re not doing too well on the old planet of Earth in the year 2139, so you’ve scraped together your savings, and you’ve jetted off to Mars - rumour has it that there’s some seriously valuable stuff on that rock, if you can find it.  You’ve bought yourself an Exo (Exoskeleton) suit, and you’re gonna mine yourself a fortune.

Just one problem - you’re not alone.

Get yourself geared up before it’s time to settle, once and for all, the question of which of you is going to get to do some mining, while everyone else is left selling their Exo suits as spare parts.


As fully expected the game came out with a decent pile of changes, but I was pleased to see that at its core, it doesn't seem to be an entirely bad game.  I've just finished revising it ready for another playtest, and I'm hoping to get it to a position where more people can see it in the not too far distant future.

Wednesday, 6 April 2016

Washing Up Fairy #FixThePlus


Seriously, ever since I moved out the washing up fairy has been slacking.  Must be nine years since that darn thing showed up.
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