Hats

I like hats.  To be precise, I like the idea of hats.  There's something about a hat (depending on style of course) that makes you feel a little bit higher class than you would be otherwise.

Unfortunately, I don't suit hats.  With the possible exception of my leather outback hat that is (I don't have a picture of this to hand so below is a picture courtesy of http://shop.earthcirclecreations.com/

My hat looks like this one.

I was in the local supermarket the other day and found myself in the clothing department - looking for gloves as mine had gone walkabout - and I came across some hats.  Well, I'd just been to watch Kingsman: The Secret Service, featuring Colin Firth looking very cool in a dapper English gentleman sort of way, so my ambition to wear a hat - to be precise, an £6 trilby hat - was awakened.

Hmm.  Not quite the stylistic English gentleman that I was going for.

I tried this hat in different sizes, but no matter which one I went for, they all looked rubbish.  In desperation I tried on all of their range of hats, in the hopes that one might suit.

I felt like some kind of rapper.  And what is that pattern on the underside of the hat - snakeskin?  I think it had a felt underside, because rappers want comfy hats.

A Union Jack beanie hat.  No words are necessary.

I think the last one is actually the best one, and I am actually toying with going back and buying one. 

Yes, a flatcap.  Yorkshire through and through.

If you like the look of any of these hats, get over to the George website!

The Pi lives!

My Raspberry Pi, after a few weeks tinkering and playing, is now fully alive and serving a purpose!

This is a bad photo of the Raspberry Pi. But I can't seem to make it take a good one.  It is a small rectangular box, after all.

If you don't know what a Raspberry PI is, it's basically a dinky computer that you can use for all sorts of things - I first got to play with one at a Raspberry Jam in November.

I've got mine hooked up to the TV downstairs to work as a media server (using RaspBMC), so I can basically connect up my media to the Pi and it'll play it on the TV.  I'm probably hideously old fashioned but I don't actually have a home network, but that's next on the to do list.

I also want to get a powered USB hub so that I can plug in more USB things into it - one of the things I want to do is plug in a couple of joypads (or are they called controllers nowadays) and play some games on the thing.

It's all good.

For a little while I was kinda annoyed that they have just brought out a new Raspberry Pi 2, which is faster and better than the original (and it came out 2 months after I got mine), but apparently the new one resets if exposed to the flash from a camera, so I feel good about that.  Although apparently you can solve the bug with a strategically placed pellet of bread, which sounds a solution bizarre enough for me to want to try it!

Do you have a Pi?  If so, what do you use it for?  If not, would you get one?

A cat post

So, today I made this video:

It's extremely bad, but I've made it because the guys behind Exploding Kittens have set a number of challenges to the community that, if achieved, will boost the rewards given to the supporters of their Kickstarter, and as I am one of them, I'm (as usual) up for looking silly if there's a possible reward behind it.  And my other half greatly enjoyed writing on my head.

This got me into thinking about doing a cat-related post.  Here's some cat facts:

Apparently cats are less stressed when sitting in a box.  I quite like sitting in boxes too.

A group of cats is called a clowder.  I can't help but think of clam chowder whenever I hear this (and I've never had clam chowder)

Cats have the skillset to use a toilet. (I assume for toilet-related purposes and not for drinking out of)

A cats brain is more like a human brain than a dogs brain.  That explains why they're so annoying.

Cats can be allergic to humans.  Which serves them right.

And here's a picture of a cat.  Thanks to George Hodan for kindly putting this into the public domain.  You're awesome.

#ExplodingKittens #update9

To all Football Clubs

I'm aware that football (aka soccer in parts of the world) is big business and the cost of top quality players is really quite high.

Plus, when I was playing Fifa 12 the other day, I realised that I was selling off the players aged 32 because they were getting too old to play.

And I'm 32.

So to all top teams, while there's still a chance of me getting a good two years solid pay from playing football at a top club, I'd like to humbly put forward myself as your next purchase.

I'm extremely skilled at running for lengths of up to three yards at a time, and running into things, I don't care what - balls, players, goalposts, I've run into all of them - and can add a wildcard feature to any match.  Regardless of the ground surface I have a decent chance of falling over and injuring myself (generally with my ankle giving way, but I could do something with my knee or ligaments if that is preferable).  This way you can be sure that I will minimise the amount of time I spend on the pitch, either playing or training, which has got to be good.

I'm more than happy to present the club in positive forms of PR, for example by advertising razors, aftershave, fast cars or holidays.  Alternatively I'd love a piano.

I think for teams up against playing rivals featuring a star striker, I can be of great use by running into the star player at full pelt, ignoring the ball.  I'm sure to get a red card (thereby entirely removing the possibility of me scoring an own goal) and with all luck I'll cripple the striker, leaving the game wide open.

I also come with my own glasses (see below).  These glasses have special features, namely:

• They steam up almost instantly, meaning that it is entirely possible that the opposing team will stop playing to watch me tackle the referee
• They pop apart upon impact, so I'm likely to attract more than my fair share of balls aimed at my head, increasing the opportunity for headers

Wily football managers could even buy me for a small sum (see below) and then offer me on a free loan to their rivals, where I'll be able to sabotage them from within.

I have studied post-match interviews at length and am confident that I can adequately represent your club, with the use of these phrases:

• "It was a game of two halves."
• "They played to win."
• "My ankle hurts."

So to attract me to your team, all I ask is a seven figure salary, a sportscar, some new trainers and an understanding that I will undertake absolutely no training whatsoever.

Neither will I play at stadiums more than 60 minutes away from my house.

I look forward to your approaches.

Times Tables

I have a vision of a school classroom, full of children, standing (why they're standing I don't know, but I imagine them standing), chanting in unison "TWO TWO'S ARE FOUR. THREE TWO'S ARE SIX. FOUR TWO'S ARE EIGHT..." and so on.

The UK Education Secretary has announced plans to ensure that all children are well grounded in the basics of English and Mathematics.  This all sounds good, I fully agree that by the time you leave school you ought to know how to do sums and read and write, and do all of these things correctly, because if you're going to apply for a job (or college, or university) you're going to be expected to have all these things sorted.

There was just one point of the news item that I read that sounds a bit questionable - I'm led to understand that the Education Secretary said "We will expect every pupil by the age of 11 to know their times tables off by heart"

I just wonder a little about how relevant times tables are, and whether they're actually the best way to educate kids about mathematics.  I was taught at home and whilst I certainly remember reading the times tables, I was always more comfortable working the sums out rather than having the sums drilled into me.

Before I wrote this, I thought to myself "What's 12 times 12?" - do I know it off my heart?  No.  But it isn't too tricky to work out - 12 times 10 is 120, plus 12, and plus another 12 - 144.

I think I'd be slightly reluctant to rely on my memory to spit out answers, certainly to the times tables that I'm less comfortable with - the sevens times table is probably the worst for me because to me there isn't an easily identifiable pattern to the numbers, so I have to work it out.  Most of the others I can either remember, for one reason or another, or I have little tricks to do the sums quickly.

Do you know your times tables?  Are there ones that you're stronger with than others?  Do you think it's better to know information by rote or to help equip children with the skills to solve problems?

As an aside, thanks to all that made contact regarding my proposed solo tabletop gaming series - I'm planning to do a pilot episode in the next week or two, and if it gets a good reception I'll look to put together a series.  Do feel free to comment with suggestions as to what game I should feature in the pilot!

Playing With Myself - thoughts?

Firstly, lets be topical - where's the snow?!?

Here in northern England we're supposed to have a good couple inches of snow by now, yet it's really not here.  A bit came down, but it hasn't settled, and all signs appear to be for a clear night tonight.  The Met Office continue to warn of snow, but I suspect, due it being relatively low ground where I live, that the most we'll get is a bit of rain and some ice to fall over on in the morning.  That said, they are suggesting that there might be a return of snow on Monday - we'll see what happens then.

Right then - I've been thinking.

My YouTube channel (and my blog too, for that matter) has been very quiet in the last few weeks.  I've had other things that I've needed to focus on, but also I've been struggling with ideas for videos.

Last night I had an idea for a tabletop gaming show - so basically card/board/dice games (but maybe I could include computer games too) - but the key is that I'm looking at single player games.  And I could call it "Playing With Myself".  So I could feature games like Patience and Solitaire, but I could try some other games - there are various sets of rules for playing Munchkin (one of my favourite games) solo, for example.  Or perhaps computer card games like Hearthstone, which although you play with someone else, the person is selected by the system, you don't need to have a friend available before you can play.

What do you think?  Let me know in the comments if you think it's a good idea or not, if you do like it are there any special games you think I should include.

Also, perhaps I need a better logo than this one!

Soft Play Adventures

I sometimes go to soft play centres.

Not, I hasten to say, by myself.  No, not at all, I take my son, mainly in an attempt to drain his seemingly endless levels of energy, so that perhaps later that day, for a minute or two, he might sit still instead of climbing onto my shoulders and attempting to yank my head clean off my neck.

If you haven't been to a soft play centre, it's basically a huge carpeted industrial unit full of padded scaffolding with slides and things that kids can climb up, slide down, plastic balls to throw, and essentially create various opportunities for them to hurt each other.  It's like a cheerful version of Gladiators.

Now when you get there, rule number one is SHOES ARE THE ENEMY.  No shoes.  You get in there, you pay your money, and you pin your child to the ground - who has spotted a multicoloured slide and now has a burning ambition to throw balls up it - to allow you to remove their shoes so that they can be released like a greyhound after a plastic rabbit.

You might entertain thoughts that the soft play centre could even be a place to relax.  There's a very nice cafe.  You can order sandwiches, or pizza, or cake, drinks (even beer).  Perhaps you take a newspaper in, and just glance every few seconds to see which child your child is terrorising (or to shout at any kids terrorising yours).

But no.

At some point, you will have to enter the happy scaffolding maze of doom, because your child will decide that:
a) They don't want to leave (and it's time to go),
b) They are tired and have gone to sleep somewhere in the structure, or
c) They are crying because they've been hit in the face by a swinging foam weight and need a hug.

You're acutely aware that you're too old to go in the structure. "UNDER SEVENS ONLY" the sign states and you attempt to perform various manoeuvres a gymnast would think twice about carrying out, in an effort to reach the distant location of your child.

You're probably readjusting your clothing as it rides up/down, unaccustomed to the strains that you're placing upon it.  If you're me, there's a fair chance that your socks have one, or more, unwanted holes in, clearly showing yourself to all to be an unfit parent.  And there is a significant chance that you'll get somewhere close to your child, only to discover a plastic mesh wall between you, and you have to double back to find another route.

Eventually, you get there, aching and tired - how do kids run around these things more than once? - and your son will sit up, smile at you, and run off, forcing you to go down the big slide by yourself, pretending to maintain your dignity while secretly enjoying the brief return to childhood.

And while other children throw plastic balls at you.

I love going to soft play.

PS - Thank you to everyone who has viewed this blog, we've passed the 600,000 view mark which is awesome indeed!

Things that are wrong...

How many of the items below do you agree are wrong?

1) Pizza with fruit on
2) Quiche with tuna
3) The Star Trek reboot (in particular, the destruction of Vulcan which eliminates the timeline of all of the previous Star Trek series - except Star Trek:Enterprise)
4) Bovril (non-granular)
5) Bovril (all forms, even granular)
6) People skipping forward in supermarket queues when a new till opens
7) The acting in "The Librarians"
8) The expression "YOLO!"
9) Overly gelled hair
10) Putting cushions on a bed so that when you actually want to go to bed you have to take the cushions off before you sleep in it.  And having to put them back on when making it.
11) Opening curtains in a morning in a room (such as the bedroom) that you aren't going to inhabit all day, until you return on an evening, and the first thing you do is close the curtains.

I have issues with 2, 3, 4, 8, 10, and 11.  Let me know in the comments if you agree with me, which you think are wrong, or if I've missed something obvious please let me know.

In other news, if you missed taking part in my 2015 predictions video, you have another chance to ask questions!  The Chinese New Year is on February 19th and I'll be doing more predictions with fortune cookies, so let me know your questions you would like answering then!  Get them in the comments or email me at mike dot raven at gmail dot com

Finally, I watched Into The Woods a week or so back, and did a review of it, do feel free to watch.  In short - where does it say in the trailer that it's a musical?!?  Be warned though - the video includes me singing.

I'm very sorry.

TableTop Day 2015 is coming!

TableTop Day 2015 is coming!

As can (just about) be seen from the fairly blurry photo of my calendar, International TableTop Day is on Saturday the 11th of April 2015.  Make sure you free up the day to play games, be they board or card, with your friends and family - or perhaps go to an event at a local games shop.  Keep an eye on http://www.tabletopday.com/ and remember - play more games!

I'd love to hear if you're planning to take part what games you're going to play.  On my shortlist is Cards Against Humanity and Munchkin - I have the special TableTop expansion for Cards Against Humanity in return for helping to fund season 3 of TableTop, hence:

And in other news, I made a fortune telling video of predictions for 2015 - if you'd like to see the fortune told in response to my fiancee asking "Am I going to get pregnant in 2015" skip along to 11:32. Fortunately she found it funny.