Sunday 29 April 2018

Avengers: Infinity War and the Tactics They Didn't Try WARNING MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS!

WARNING THIS POST MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS ABOUT AVENGERS: INFINITY WAR. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ SPOILERS THEN DON'T READ THIS POST, READ THIS ONE ABOUT CATS INSTEAD


Image by Cicero R.V. from https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Infinity_war.png on a CC-BY SA 4.0 license



So, last night we went to see Avengers: Infinity War.

In summary - Wow.

The evening started off good with some free ice cream (thanks Ben & Jerry!) and got better.

mmm free is good :)

Despite the warnings, I'm not going to give you a huge amount of detail on the plot, if you want to find out the plot without watching the film there's plenty of websites that will tell you that. In brief, a guy called Thanos aims to recover the six Infinity Stones, which if he succeeds in doing so will result in him being able to carry out his ultimate goal - genocide.

Now, the film is absolutely brilliant, especially for someone who has watched many (although admittedly not all) of the Marvel films beforehand, and it's great to see all of the many threads of the various films coming together.

Thanos image adapted from https://www.flickr.com/photos/27745117@N00/40051431344 by Hannaford on a CC-BY SA 2.0 license

There are a couple of comments I have to make about the film, however.

Now, you'll note from the image above, Thanos holds the coloured Infinity Stones in the Infinity Gauntlet, a specially made gauntlet capable of containing the power of the stones.

There appears to be a couple of tactics that no one thought of trying. Of course, I fully expect to be shot down by fans - and do not, by any stretch of the imagination, think that my following comments mean that I didn't like the film, or I don't want to see what happens next. It's made clear in the film that Doctor Strange looked at millions of different futures, and found only one that resulted in victory, so you must assume that he took the route that would hopefully lead to that one successful future.


But I have to say.


Cut the arm off.



Sorry, that didn't come out right. What I mean was:


CUT THE ARM OFF

Or, even...


CUT THE FUCKING ARM OFF



Doctor Strange's teleporty hole ability seems ideal for chopping Thanos's arm off and sticking it on a different planet somewhere. Cut the arm off, then he can't work the gauntlet. Stick it on Thor or someone and let him pwn Thanos with his own glove.

Tactic two, which again you assume Doctor Strange must have seen and discounted was to simply use the Time Stone (which he was keeping) to go back in time, and then do whatever in order to stop Thanos - like CHOPPING HIS ARM OFF.

Of course, either of these would have made for a very short movie. If you could go back in time, in theory you could resolve any kind of issue before it starts.

Preferably by cutting arms off.

Anyway - now I've enraged the millions of Marvel fans across the globe - I have to say, once again, it's an absolutely awesome film. Go see it :)

7 comments:

  1. Violence is not the answer, Mike. We should try counseling first, don't you think?

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    1. Probably true Tim. But if it doesn't work out then can I cut the arm off?

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